All I Can Wonder is, “Has Ron Jeremy Signed His Donor Card?”

USA TODAY: U.S. vet receives first total penis, scrotum transplant

I’ll Ask. Walmarts in Alabama Sell Vegetables?

20-mile chase of meth suspect ends in Walmart produce section; passenger found passed out in truck |

I thought they just sold guns and liquor.

Who in the Hell Would Steal This???

National parks in Arizona using microchip tech to deter thieves

So, apparently this is a thing:

Saguaros, an enduring symbol of the Southwest, can grow to more than 40 feet tall, weigh up to a ton and live 200 years.

You can hear the thieves making off with their ill-gotten gain in the night. They’re the ones going, “Owowowowow!!!”